Mutual Investment

My experiences as a girlfriend, wife, and fiance have been less than fulfilling.

I am not sure how to screen for how mutual collaboration can be a guarantee in a relationship.

I know that when I commit, I am “all in.” There is a complete package and more, capable of dynamic innovation, on my side.

But, unfortunately, I’ve found the other side lacking in willingness to take the lead and dynamically teach me new things.

Taking turns to lead and follow is what keeps congruency healthy.

How do we initiate conversations about love’s applicable functionality without seeming heavy-handed and demanding?

My natural initiative only knows that whatever I did “right” in the past was resisted and/or rejected – and was certainly not appreciated nor equally reciprocated.

I get that no one wants to be stuck following and adhering to stodgy rules – for then, where is there room for spontanaeity’s excitement?

But, without good and frequent communication, much can go amiss by misunderstandings while “waiting” for the “highs” we desire from good pair bonding.

In observing patterns, it seems these wonderful “benefits” come from putting the foundational and continuous work into commitment.

Having a good base gives freedom to fly – how do I know when I’ve found a capable and willing guy?