“Injuries. quite literally, leave a lot to be desired.”
Category: The Accident – As Of 10/10/25 Early AM Named “Clyde” (Short For Collide) Because It’s Funny And I Deserve Mirth At Its Expense
Absence Of Reality
“A gal with her hair down in light fashion blue jeans and a bright white tank top bounces around spouting happily without a care, sing-songing ‘Mo-ving Daaaayyy’ in the commercial to rouse excitement, fun, and joy in the process.
I start dark chuckling to myself, ‘Aw, come on…add a little more limp.'”
Technical Difficulties
If I knew how to apply
Wouldn’t have to rue it
As computer navigating’s
Software often changing
What’s the actual entry point?
What program would lead me?
Always bumping up against limitations
But is it really best when sky’s the limit
When added hurdle of the brain injury
Gets in the way of what I can perceive?
I mean, I see it – but something will not believe it
And gets hijacked with cars crashing along trains
Missing Components
“Patched together carriage and strength.”
Lock Down
“It could be assumed that many options along many avenues could be explored in multi-tasks along a same timeline’s continuum…
That’s how I used to operate.”
Pieces Of Structure
“New and reorganized patterns of functionality that join to connect along one line of continuum when highest priority.”
3 Year Anniversary
“I guess that I should be celebrating…:
Three Years Later
“My tissues are at last reconnectong – and I can begin pushing back at painful accident impact spasms.”
It Irks Me
“That I can no longer be all of the parts that could express their selves in me, had they been given clemency.”
My Short Term Memory
Calisthenics
“I hopefully began watching a 15-minute home workout program – but then internally balked as the first moves were deep squats coming up with a high forward leg raise lifting.
Laughing weakly to myself, I joked out loud softly “Well that’s not hap-pen-ninggg…”
Fumegated Brain Injury
“It has become more difficult to ascertain what I can or ought to be doing to help improve my situation.”
Hopeless In Arcadia
“Sometimes I feel like there’s nothing that I can do anymore to make my life better…
In fact, it often feels like if I am not gripping while slipping, then I am definitely losing ground.”
On My Terms!
“First time back in a raquetball court since before my accident – and it felt GREAT ripping myself apart as I chased that ball!”
(Gonna paayyy for it, thoouuggh)
Fumes On A Brain Injury
She knew what she was doing and had identified the unscented lotion correctly to refill the unscented applicator.
But afterwards, she found that she had somehow, instead, refilled it with lavendar – which then initiated an internal panic chain reaction.
(Close-in object identification tracking going haywire)
Staying On Track
“Why couldn’t I before have tried the key on the vehicle door to try to lock it?
Because I was already overloaded tracking other time paralleling tracks.”
They Say, “Stay Curious”
“But I do not want to explain nor experience these added symptoms to my injuries list.”
And My Joints Say
“HEEEEEEEEEY!”
I Lost
“In a game of ‘bumper cars.'”
Compression Spasms
“I’d like to think that someday I won’t be in so much pain…
They say that death guarantees that…
But then there’s incorporeal pain.”
Mustering
“Must every effort require more to complete – with ever increasing pain intensity?”
It’s Time
“To begin rebuilding separation of issues in my body’s muscularity.”
Sometimes,
“It sure feels like things will never get better.”
(God’s – Sleep Token)
Bad-A**
“Bit**.”
As Of Today,
“I weigh 199 lbs.
That’s cortisol mixed into injuries for ya!”
Object-ivity
When she looked at something directly, she could “see” in front and behind it – but it was like her brain turned off her eyes’ ability to see the object itself clearly.
Sometimes,
“I just feel like a stack of wobbly bowling pins, trying to dodge that ball…”
A Significant Shift
“A piece of my occipital compression shift-released at last!”
Jattery
“Nothing’s wrong, but synaptic impulses claim otherwise.”
Post-Strain Brain Injury Disregulation
After calling doctors for new symptom help:
“Now, back to my own physical therapy restabilizing exercises – because that’s the only thing that has ever really helped!”
“Mum’s” The Word
“If back off, I can receive help and time for more needed recovery.
But if I don’t also push – and precisely at that – then I miss the basic sustenance marker, under which I could still qualify.”
I’ve Been
“Pushing too hard.”
It Feels Like
I keep going past limits.
Hon,
I fake my ease…until I make it.”
After The Car Accident
“I had to shove aside the fears associated with suddenly not being able to grip or lift things properly.”
At Least I First Made It To 50’s
And Now…
“I have 15 minutes to do too many things without tearing my tissues further.
It’s amazing how we can take for granted ease of movement when we naturally have tissue connectivity integrity.
I miss those days…
Correction: 10 minutes.”
Self Projecting
“I am still hurt and my needed bits are not reconnected, so when pushed by timeliness and necessary labor, it’s my anger that brings strength to me by filling in the gaps and spaces with liquid rage.
And then when I can take a break for a moment, somewhere inside in the background, my subconscious is whimpering and crying hysterically while my ego screams ‘YAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH’ triumphantly for having achieved and beaten back disability.
In the late evenings and early mornings, I am not ok…
But I keep trying to be.”
(Title play with words)
Seething Resentment
“I used to have occasional cranky periods, but they would come and go like temporary storms looking forward to the sunlight, again.
Now, because I have to keep physically and mentally powering through everything while suporessing emotion with little rest and down time for recuperation, I carry a molten fire cloud around me emitting angry, vexed, and determined frustration
D9 NOT make eye contact with me during these times, because my eyes will shoot out laser beams and burn friendliness to cinders as I grit my teeth – more upset by the invasion of my privacy intrusion.
Yeah, I dare you.
(Honestly, I do try to be nice while growling and struggling – but still, don’t tempt me)
Until it’s time to perform healing therapies, where I must access the other, finer qualities of my personality for others’ benefit.
And then it’s right back into the pit fires of Hell for me.”
Almost 4 Years Later
‘I’ve never heard of a car accident’s impact causing such injuries as I have experienced.”
Storage
Heaving and cussing, with the best of intentions.
Reclaiming Space
“It was difficult being squeezed out and against the walls by others taking over the space in my own home, and scattered my sense of self and any functionality after prior car accident injuries were made worse by the shower slip’s concussive fall.”
Agitation
“Repeating movements.”
I Think
“I am overcompensating for way too much.”
ADHD?
“Or strained brain injury?”
Post-Move Swelling
“It concerns me that my larger rings are tighter.”
Injury Management
“Tracking time, waiting for when help can come for final moving.”
My Aim
“In coordination is getting better.”
Yeah…
“I am supposed to pack more, but I have always pushed myself several leveld beyond capacity.”
