Month: August 2025

Sunlight’s warmth to greet me
Leaves, grass, trees, and sky

Mountains protecting
Soothing inner eyes

“‘Oh, sweet relief!’ as we returned to the first floor of normal sounds and colors!”

“Difficulty because hospital corridors contain multiple frequency reverberating hums, and everything in view is 3-D grids.”

“I don’t know why, but it is harder for me to get to my own doctor appts.

Had to get to MRI’s this morning.

First of all, I am no longer ok in the morning.

You could say it’s because I don’t get to sleep until around 2am or so, but my internal biorhythms are altered.

And I won’t detail the diffuculty, but once I got into the hospital where everything was shutdown to minimum operations on the weekend, I had to request wheelchair assistance to help me get checked in and settled into the correct waiting room properly.

The anxiety crush meltdown of gratefully accepting a wheelchair to be shuttled more quickly and safely than my legs and increasing disorientation could take me was alarming.

But there was a kind, older lady that I helped get confirmed in her own location, and she extended to me saying, ” Always ask for a wheelchair in the airport,” confidingly – as I just about broke into tears for needing the darn thing.”

“It feels like there is no real help, only signs and signals pointing the way if one keeps looking for and innovating solutions despite ‘diminishing’ capacities.”

“The injuries are becoming a psychological hindrance as they do not fade – but, in fact, become more insistent and prevalent.

The mind cannot help but panic when experiencing increasing complication impulses – yet, it must struggle to overcome meltdown shutdowns while seeking a newly defined pragmatism.

For it makes sense that as more systems reboot, extent of prior damages becomes ever more clear – and that system overload would increase as additional jagged impulses are seeking to be added to healing’s reintegration.”

“Means something entirely different in seeking balance when one’s boat is flipped, and staying submerged in water’s engulfing suction seems to be the end result, anyway  (unrelenting) – especially when one’s sea legs are no longer stable above surface in sailing.”

“Trying to reclaim norms, but norms are now distorted.

This doesn’t mean that things are ‘bad.’

(Sweat)

Things, relatively, might be ‘good.’

(Distrust)

In fact things may be, given skews, ‘getting better, again.’

(Panic)”

“‘Objects in motion stay in motion…’

Newton’s First Law of Motion; also known as The Law of Inertia

I just keep going because it feels like if I stop, I’ll just need to lie back down.”

“I had to cancel work until next week because there’s no doubt I got reinjured.

I hate this.

I hate too much pain and lack of pleasure.

I hate limits without any workarounds.”