Dear Friend,

“So this issue regarding the marriage conundrum is still a thing…

There seems no way to escape that door shutting after a couple marries and they are ‘shoved close into the room of their lives’ together.

From what I can surmise, the only way their relationship will have a chance to survive and grow is if they unpack everything right then and there – truthfully and honestly while identifying strengths, weaknesses, goals, dreams, desires, where they are vulnerable to outside and internal influences and strategizing and committing to be a team dedicated to each other’s mutual flourishing.

But most people don’t know this about marriage needing to have a blueprint or survival kit – and then suddenly the ghosts and ghoulies from inside and externally decide to come visiting.

Pressures, ‘babes’ – they get squeezed, pulled, crushed & compressed, and then project negatively onto each other for it.

I’m just speaking of the casualties – the ones who don’t make it.

I don’t know how those who make it get through this stage – except to say that it would seem to be an essential part of due diligence to at least discuss these things prior to marriage for ensuring that the couple at least starts off on a same page that they could return to and refashion for reconnection and rebonding with each other.

And, I can say that having already tried longterm relationships without marriage, something vital in commitment was always very much lacking.

What do you think about these concepts, what has been your experience, and what do you think could work well to ensure evolving success in partnership?