“I just cannot handle additional levels of pain to the load that I’ve already been carrying..”
Blog
Injury
“My mind keeps saying that I’m dying…”
The Wall Between Us
One night, she delayed her shower and entered the darklit dream world earlier than usual in a desperate attempt to flee the concussion’s pain.
Yet because she was ahead of schedule, as she came upon the veil’s wall that she usually tried to nightly climb in hopes of catching glimpses of him wherever he could be, she came upon his ladder – still leaning against the wall on her side from where he had crossed over to watch her from a closer distance.
Do You Love Me?
Dear Friend,
“The relationship videos are ‘whacked’ – with every one of them trying to sell something to get a viewer to keep visiting.
We make our own pact.
What matters is what works for our own needs.”
Dear Friend,
“I broke down in training today while being worked on because of the pain I keep getting hammered by.
But toward the end of my turn to receive as learning, an image and sense of you lying next to me, opening your arms to me shocked me.
I wasn’t looking for you because I’ve been trying to stay neutral – but there you were for me.”
Dear Alex,
“The concussion and thoracic pain hurts so bad that my eyes are literally twitching.
Now I need a new fecking category.”
Tell It
(NEVER GOING BACK – nobigdyl, Kato On The Track, Project Pat, Anthony “MIXEDBYAC” Carballo)
Oh Yeah, Man…
“Day 2 after shower/tub wall head crunch = thoracic and head severe muscle torsion pain hits.
Tomorrow’s gonna be worse – and this week’s likely gonna be hard.
‘BEE-YATCH!'”
Song Reference
“Pushing Buttons” by Mendoza Line
Today’s DJ Quote
“Your parents know how to push your buttons – because they installed them.”
107.1 FM Portland 12:45pm
Wild Magic (Song)
By Athena Stairs, November 16, 2025
He’s drenched in it
I’ve got to help him
Better channel conduits
Taking good care of him
I need to learn his ways
Match up to syncopation
Gotta lift him up to reach
Higher levels’ expressions
—
(Please contact me for permissions)
You Were Never Lovelier
(DEEWANIYAT – Ek Deewane Ki Deewaniyat & Harshvardhan Sonam, Vishal Mishra, Kaushik, Guddu, Kunaal)
King Of The Mist
Oh night time spirit of Elden white
Blessing revealed in bright sunlight
Wherefore have gone without a kiss?
Your courage my boon sorely missed
The Vow Movie End Clip – We Meet Again
(Zeven – Be Here Soon – iamamiwhoami)
(After Dark – Mr. Kitty – The Gorge Movie Edit Spoiler)
Predator Or Protector?
(Before We Drown – Depeche Mode)
(It Doesn’t Matter – Depeche Mode)
Some Great Reward
She had not thought of the consequences to herself for bracing against the incoming car’s impact – only that she was in a split second outraged and defiant in her refusal to let the man’s short-sightedness use her and her vehicle as inadvertent means to harm anyone around her.
—
(Title is also the name of a Depeche Mode album)
In Jest
The night shirt that she sometimes wore shaped her chest as in Greecian times, puffed out below, and then cinched inward at her wauit in a kind of elegant flump.
She could not help but tease to him that she looked as graceful as a black flan – or perhaps a wrinkly-lined fig fruit- knowing that the images thereby imprinted upon his mind were like playful record scratches.”
“Taking Flight With Light”
“InVerse”
Dear Friend,
“I’m so tired…so very, very tired.”
My Love,
“They say that I shouldn’t – that I should maintain equality, if not demand status.
But I love indulging you.”
—
(Content of many meanings)
Dear Friend,
“Miss you.”
(Keep Me – LateChoir)
(Carrying Your Love With Me – George Straight)
(Still Alive – Over The Gun, From Viddo Game “Portal”)
Two. Hours. Later…
“Still alive – and back to retraining…’knock on wood.'”
“Though Engulfed, She Reemerges”
Back To What I Do
“Something about survival -?”
4AM Radio Propaganda
“If you blame it all on the aliens and Yetti, humans no longer need to have accountability.”
And Then,
“My crystal necklace that has been missing for awhile suddenly pops out of the suitcase when I pull out a leather bag that I had thought was empty!”
Halt This Eclipse, Baby
(Show Me – Caseet)
Of What Benefut?
“Slippery floor and hospital visit…
I should have gone to that concert instead of trying to rest and recover -?”
Another Night
“Little sleep, but unlike the homeless also at the hospital for help, I have showered and can still mask my own ‘insanity.'”
Needed Soothing (Telomeres – Sleep Token)
Healing Hands
“They must have worked -!
A higher ranking rare and bizarre experience than I have ever had before.
Thank you for your blessings, oh ‘ghosts’ of the ER!”
(I Feel Alive – Vibfy)
Pain
“Confirmation of life.”
(Can I have some joy and pleasure, please?)
Prognosis
“I shall live.”
(When Your Falling – Peter Gabriel
I Has
Headphones
Repeat
Fall…
Get back up…
“General Hospital”
“My life is offici!lly a soap opera.”
