“Without enough funding, problems keep arising – no matter where you chop to cut the line.”
Category: Altered States
My Head
“Is firming up, again.”
How Did I?
“Get pulled into and caught up in this constant struggle for survival?”
(No Survivors – Jeremy Camp)
Ok…
“There’s a reason why I am eating a chocolate-covered cherry nearly every day, recently…”
Feck
“Can I have a day when I am not having to ‘freak-the-fu**-out?”
Medication
“Pretty much for the entirety of working to recover from the car accident, I have avoided medications.
But once the impact’s swelling of the concussion hit, taking a routine combo has been key to my regaining any progress traction.”
(Equinoccio De Serpientes – TRIBU)
Tail Spin
“Pulling out of one surpasses extreme levels of difficulty.”
“Hi, Guys…”
“I am beginning to be able to feel my anterior neck muscles, again…”
One, Two Three, Four
“Put it in a pocket – out the door!”
Motor Reactions
“I am getting better at catching random objects in my functional environment before they fall after being knocked, but there is no cure for the witch hazel bottle squeeze-spilling out at the base of its cap where its design should have prevented, every time I tip the bottle to use it.”
Running The Gauntlet
“We had to errect another barrier with chairs this evening.
There are now three layers of gating – including chairs and not including bedroom doors – that must be traversed in clambered, tricky imbalances around and through to get between bedrooms and the kitchen.
I must pragmatically think of this now as if it is a retraining course.”
Unreal Messages
“‘You don’t have to be strong all of the time…’
Oh, yeah?
Where’s my help?
All of the dishes get dirty by others after I’ve washed them – already hurting myself;
I’m doing cross-country terrain navigating regarding just my house even – through, around, and over hurdles with torn hips and ligaments screaming upon lifting and landing;
And no matter the efforts I put into anything, if I don’t keep up momentum, everything immediately spirals or crashes into diminished returns.
I am on my own, here – literally, IT’S ALL UP TO ME.
So kiss my a** – why don’t-cha?
Or step up and help me move this ever-sinling/capsixing ship of my life thing!”
Missing Charger
“I packed it.
I know I packed it.
But I couldn’t find it.
And still cannot find it.
How can I not find and see something so garishly and haphazardly taped, unhelpfully stiff, and ever awkwardly priorly being dragged everywhere with me?
Granted, it has now become an electrical fire hazard waiting to happen – which is ironic that I have completely covered it in the color of bright red, yet ignore the obvious warning.
The question begs to replace it.
But I can’t afford to spend money on this.
So I’m jumping between laptop and car slow charger cords – and basically getting tangled up in slipping functioning.
Phone now low at 16 and rapidly decreasing percent.
Correction: just got the 15% battery is about to die warning.”
I Don’t Know, Man
“I don’t know what the future brings!”
The Next Blow
Some things, the audience did not need to know…
Eye PigMentation
There was a time when the
Color of eyes defined origins
Blue was of ocean and sky
Brown was of earthen tribes
And green were forest people
We weren’t supposed to interbreed because
Our cultures experienced life so differently
But love has ways of bridging hearts
So that colors can mix into rainbows
And deception’s jealously lacks in-sight
Therefore plucks by breaking windows
(Multiple meanungs)
(Calcutta – Sleep Token)
Stop The Machine
Good people, valuable people, worthy people are daily being pushed into positions where they are forced to compromise values that we need to uphold and positively reinforce because they are desperately fighting for their own continued survival.
You Have No Idea
Fury too damn late
Reason dislocates
And you’ll never have to talk about it
You’ll never wanna talk about it
—
(Sleep Token “Granite” lyrics)
Imprint’s Admission
He’d made a mistake in keeping her guessing.
Whatever original intentions, his anonymity was allowing others to infiltrate and attempt to manipulate.
This had caused her to attach to one possibly incorrectly – and then, later to another, causing internal dichotomy.
Due to her adherence to faith and loyalty in love, this put her now on the edge of duplicity.
How had she been man-euvered into this position?
Inside, she screamed at the pain as she felt torn apart from within.
Why?
Why was she put into this position?
She struggled to rip her heart out of these embedments so that she could feel honest and free again.
What she wished most was to live honestly, to give purely, and to not contribute to deception’s sins.
Especially when it came to the heart that she had most wished to champion.
So she withdrew again, less able to trust than before – which compressed passions.
Mystery
Draws us closer by illusion of safety
But if not careful, becomes entangling
Fragmenting orientation’s spacial reality
(I Stand Alone – Godsmack)
Strain
“Having to be master over my emotions, rather than getting to physically express them in a safe environment.”
(Hey Mama – The Black Eyed Peas)
Why Is It So Hot?
The room wasn’t supposed to be so hot that she was sweating…
Yet somewhere, out there, was an unwashed older woman, still likely scrambling to find heat while lying on freezing, hard concrete.
YouTube
“It’s like shakin’ a Magic 8 Ball.”
(December, 1963 [Oh What A Night] – Frankie Valli & The Four Seasons)
(Living For The Love Of You – Isley Brothers)
Uncertain Footing
These days, she did not want to get dumped on her a**.
(Multiple meanings)
She Didn’t Know
What did it all mean?
It Threw Her Off
That one had been so jealous, another so concerned – and yet, the third just kept on smiling at her, even as he placated.
Quite Frankly
She didn’t know what to believe anymore.
Inside or out.
(After longterm strain of maintaining)
Hee Hee Hee!
“Reading another ‘love message,’ it definitely was not meant for me because it got two out of three aspects about me very wrong.
Though I value it, I do not cook much – and definitely bomb or ‘corrupt’ the original recipes’ intentions with some serious additional skew.
And, though I’d like my house to be clean, achieving such accomplishment lasts maybe half of a day before it again succumbs to the ravages of engulfing entropy.
Therefore, my efforts must be conserved and targeted.”
Retractioms
She did not like causing people pain, even though she was in pain.
Literally
So much remains to be seen.
Temporal Issues
“I have difficulty getting anywhere ‘on time.”
(The clock and brain injury)
The Difference
“How we treat each other while ‘playing the game.'”
Basically,
It had become clear that she caught up in a game, afterall.
3rd Person
How can tears fall without expression of emotion?
The body knows.
It expresses the soul’s hidden traces.
(Title of multiple meanings)
Goopy Tears
She had thought that her eyes were just watering.
Gen X Channel Surfing
Non
“Apparently, no wine for me.
Not even the smallest amount.”
Thai Coconut Pancakes
“Pretty good warmed up (do not eat cold – ew!), but waiting now to see how system digests them.
Trader Joe’s had them in their frozen desert section.”
Lashback
“Hm…
Even my arms are turning purple, today.
Penitence for having fun, ‘for once.'”
(Even In Arcadia – Sleep Token)
Ooow-oo
Getting up and trying to stand – let alone, walk.
Momentum’s Weight
“Nooo – I liked that pillow!”
(Accidently hurling it over and off of the side of the bed and onto the floor as turning to rise and get ready for the day)
Candid Corvid Productions 