Category: Comedy
Jaws Backwards
Mmmaaaaaahhhaaaaaaaa
Not to be confused with “moo.”
(So exhausted)
Tell Me To Calm Down…
The Cat’s Out Of The Bag
And then jumps right back into it!
(That’s what cats do!)
Go On…
“Tell me more.”
Dragon Theme Song
“Mutton Chops”
What?
“You didn’t think angels could have teeth?”
Relationships
Mirth
“Please contact me for permissions…” teeth neatly folded, all polite and proper – after screaming enraged with fangs while death metaling.
“Neo Zim Dweebie”
“Blast from the past.”
Oh, Yeah? (My, My, My – Johnny Gill)
How I Roll
Lounge pants and a t-shirt
Giddy
“I think my brain is.”
Your Own Color
Dressed In Black
Sleep Token Fans Be Like
(Snap Yo Fingers – Lil Jon)
How-Ba-Dya-Want-Chya-Cof-Fee?
“Never before experienced cap twisting refusing to spiral-off open just kept turning in my every attempt.
So YA…
I took a very sharp-pointed knife and carefully pry-popped it open!”
I’m So Tired
Eee-Hee-Hee!
Inviting The Right Guests
Now I want to learn that dance!
“Amassed”
“Scree!”
“Good Intentions”
([Ghost] Riders In The Sky – Johnny Cash)
Momentum
“Becomes key is generating propulsion progress with any masking for perceived smoothness.
‘Gee – she’s got a peppy step!'”
Grace & Coordination
“It’s like every move is a dance coordinating and transferring energy of movement along fine line barely functional tracks passing between muscles willing and able to briefly take the load – but these groups are always shifting.
Who needs external distractions, when there’s a whole internal world to manage and govern?”
“Freedom!”
“With fist raised after triumphantly declaring victory, I shall press the backward arrow and reclick the song that I want to play as many times as it takes to not play those ads!”
(Gleeful chuckling at my own sillyness)
Hacking The System
“No matter what I did, I could not peal/pull open again the top of the container still holding my remaining and much hungered for roast beef and swiss cheese slices.
In retaliation at the flared inflammation response wave of psychic thwartation frustration, I grabbed the bottom of the plastic and squeezed hard with both sets of fingers – until the lid had no choice under severe pressure but to pop off!”
“That Chair Didn’t Care”
Medieval Ways To Say “I’m Not Coming”
Jyuce
Mispelled, but maybe better!
(Propane Eyes – Antizero)
Can’t hear or find the lyrics, but title is fun!
“My Succotash Wish”
“Is that like…tasty?”
(Re Deee-Lite’s ” Groove Is In The Heart”)
You Know It’s Gonna
“Now that I am full-swing enjoying my rocking chair, at some point the rusted welding will snap – and I’ll go flying!”
If The Godfather Was Arabic
I Am Told This Is Me
“There’s A Chicken In My Carpet!”
What The -?! (Got Me)
Critter Dance
How Courting Should Be
Lint
“I got to the gym and realized that I was a fuzz monster.”
Grabitty-Crab
Learning To Swim
(White Cadillac – The Ripcords)
String Bikini
“Yeah, no.
I won’t be wearing one – unless the strings are just hanging off from it as fringe.
‘Yeah, baby.'”
—
(Refering to The Ripcords’ song, “White Cadillac.”)
To The Last!
“To the last, I will grapple with thee…from Hell’s heart, I stab at thee! For hate’s sake, I spit my last breath at thee!”
Spoken by “Khaaaaaaan!” (Kirk yelling, lol) of the movie “Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan.”
(Even funnier with lots of spitting, hissing lithspsss)
Candid Corvid Productions 