Lone Wolf

Vengeance (Will Be Mine)

The scent of blood was thick in the air.

But it wasn’t the blood of an honest kill to keep a starving pack’s generations thriving.

It was the smell of a gunshot wound made at distance by cowardice, painfully festering.

Normally, she respected other predators, but those who hurt her had to be stopped.

Her wound kept seaping – wouldn’t heal with bullet still imbedded deep into flesh.

Metal poisoning was invading her system, forcing attention to keep fighting madness.

She knew who they were now, and knew how they could also be hunted – destroyed.

Her life and pack’s survival now at risk, her snarl grinned anticipating their fragile skin.

The Accident - As Of 10/10/25 Early AM Named "Clyde" (Short For Collide) Because It's Funny And I Deserve Mirth At Its Expense

Eye Tracking

This is part of the tangled brain’s system.

Difficulty is ikely due to nerve compression.

This makes it hard to navigate career retraining data collection / interpretation.

Doing the work, itself, is not the problrm.

And yet, the extreme vexation from visual overload and brain mis-signaling is vexing.

Which burns limited tolerance capacities.

Healing Therapy, The Accident - As Of 10/10/25 Early AM Named "Clyde" (Short For Collide) Because It's Funny And I Deserve Mirth At Its Expense

Retraining Micro Tissues

As no therapy yet has addressed the overstretched support tissues surrounding my nerves and I am still denied boon of receiving help from neurology specialists, I have embarked upon my own form of torture therapy.

I have cushioned, rubber flip flops that are firm enough in the surface area of my thongs to rock my imbalance all over the place, causing my limb and torso muscles to shake and wuiver and my vertigo to swing extreme range.

Well…

Even though this alarmingly increases nerve compression and resultant referential numbness spreading, what else can I do while waiting and deadlines keep crushing?

Lone Wolf

Higher Ground

Though I climbed to higher ground to escape man’s latest machinations, my second-in-command paced to find me.

Rather than greetimg me with wagging tail and renewed faith from my recent proven accomplishments, for a second time since the herd left I found myself backed up against a boulder defending myself under attack, pressed by fear in lost pack security.

As I self defended, I countered in every way my exhausted brain could think to dodge the blows against my reason, but youth’s unrelenting desperation kept hitting me in waves and my wearied mind took damage.

In last attempt to keep from harming them from my own fear’s reactivity and hurt rage at being turned against, I disengaged and slipped past them – and kept running to stay out of reach while as I distanced it hurt my soul to hear their howls of frustration.

I am accused now of abandoning my pack’s needs. I am accused of negligent leadership – as if I have not been right here protecting them and foraging resources for continued survival despite my untended injuries.

My heart feels outcast from my clan again, and it grieves me that youth is so inclined to turn against wiser elders during difficulties.

Man has been efficient in cutting families off from loving cohesion, ensuring our tribes remain divided and weakened in numbers.

At first, they murdered us out of fear and in the name of their progress. Now they starve us due to pure greed and intolerance – for anything Wild, Man must be sure to destroy.

Is it a type of afflicted illness?

For surely Man is insane.

Yet it is up to us to rally against this madness to find our peace again.

Alex (An Ideal)

Dear Alex,

It seems clear now that I was sent to you to be a catalyst.

Part of the prompting system – if not the carrot, then the prod for you to make a certain decision.

I hate being used in such capacity.

No matter how I wrestle with it, it always cuts deeply because I lost.

Fresh wounding, always repeating.

There seems to be no balm to soothe.

I hate that.