We were ousted from another home due to yet another’s addiction, only to find that we could not find any replacememt housing.
This initiated a next-level sequence of events which kept pushing me further away from regaining solid ground, and subverted the creative-expressive person I had invested again to be.
Out in the sun scooping dog poo in my pleasant reveries this Sunday morning, in the bushes and trees next to me, a hummingbird began trilling.
As I return to the creative arts, happiness appears easily in moments of silly emitting and ease with what’s around me.
944 is an incredible message…it shows you that success and fulfillment are on the horizon. You simply need to prioritize yourself, your goals, and your spiritual growth.
“Empedocles’ idea that the qualities of matter come from the relative proportions of each of the four elements entering into a thing.”
Wikipedia (haha!)
I am finding more beautiful-soul people.
Giving to the givers, rather than the takers.
Before, I always had to worry that everyone else could manage while I was away – which often gave a misread to my own sense of security.
If it’s a part of life’s requirements, then I will change the components so that I enjoy it.
I thought, ok – yeah, sure…
I know how to tecover from this.
But I did not realize it would be a longer journey.
This will be the first time in over 5 years that we have been able to decorate and celebrate.
Why did I dream about playing the guitar, when trying to do so would increase finger cramping?
I need to cool this inflammation down.
I must regain my mind’s territory and conjure my spirit’s dreams into reality.
Monday, with precisioned chiropractic care and gentle, calculated traction, I could feel my anterior hip begin to readjust properly in its socket.
The kind I crave is my own.
I will work in the music and film industry.
lu·men1
/ˈlo͞omən/
noun
PHYSICS
plural noun: lumens
Oxford
(Yaaas, definition is more of my languaaaage! “Steradian!” “Candela!”)
I need pressure removed – not added to the equation. How do I reconfigure this thing!
Being me currently is like waking up from a coma to find others’ lives proceeded smoothly while mine was left broken on the curbside.
“Hello. My name is Athena, and I’m a suppressed creative trying to recover my identity after being persecuted and silenced by “polite society.”
If one more person tries to tell me that as a visionary I should get my head out of the clouds – when I should be learning how to embrace this gift more fully – I tell you, with this migraine, I am go-ing to SCREAM!
Hey, man…
We’re all just practicin’ here.
Nobody has to be perfect.
I rise to the roles that I can – and am allowed to play.
This concept that one can just reach out into a pool of gasping anchovies and derive sustenance may work if you have a big enough net to haul in a large enough supply, but does not apply to monogamy – so why expose myself and try?
Likely, the biggest issue from the car accident is that neurologically all my cells continue to fire alarm signals because I was “attacked,” which makes me feel more vulnerable and in greater need of soothing.
It is important to note that where I’ve come from in my past has not been by way of the Sea of Tranquility.
It has been a journey through ravaged lands where nearly everyone I met was some sort of “unhinged” or infected by others’ “crazy.”
It is not that I have an issue of low self esteem, but that I get discouraged if there is no plausible reason for me to be somewhere that I would like to be.
While I chafe at the limiting constrictions of employment, neither am I able to rest at ease by carrying all of the pressures of entrepreneurship.
Observant of her patterns, yet uncertain exactly how and where to change them.
She stayed up late at night, keeping watch for some unknown reason.
She was glad for the intervention because she had felt prodded by the visions.
Now, with no way to make contact, she was granted space to retrain focus.
A better car and some unfinished business.
Joy
Decompressing thigh and hip attachments.
They say that demand increases when there is less of a supply.
But it really depends upon trends in current perceived values.
Because I can’t, I keep doing anyway.
For life is too short
And time stretches
Only so long as we allow
Our inner selves to dream.
If I calculate love expressed and lost, the odds either increase in favor of repeating – or they brim on the verge of tipping into success.
If “no one of worth would want the true me,”
If a suitable person does, are they worthy?
(Title play with words)
Being blocked from giving healing therapies is making me realize how much of my heart and mind’s soul that I have been giving to people.
Sometimes I chortle to myself over my creations.
(Title quote from Movie Jurassic Park)
(Title play with words)
Very carefully, friendships are cultivated.
I need to avoid people who could turn on me.
One thing about wild magic is the difficulty of knowing which elements of talent to awaken and set free into expressing.
I hate to admit it, but my need for withdrawal from general society is getting more extreme.
Which is opposite from the actuality of daily activitues.
adjective
Oxford
Is not meant to be “used.”
It is not a “means to an end.”
Love.
Survival.
I need to be doing things that are innovative and cutting-edge – otherwise, there is no grist in them for me.
Candid Corvid Productions 