Candid Corvid Productions

When I have loved before
It has all been in my mind

The guy(s) didn’t show up
Even when in same rooms

So I have an aversion to
Only having love in mind

Because it’s too close to
Only talking with my self

And too much reinforces
Feelings of staying lonely

—

(Title of multiple meanings)

“In the dream’s outdoor piling at night, I came across my ex’s blue jean jacket with the thick white inner lining.

I recognized it by feel first, rather than sight.

And having forgotten about it simply from lack of prior reexposure to it over time, I grasped it and pulled it to me, marveling at its feel, its neutral yet almost leather smell from motorcycle and auto fumes, and remembered when I wore it proudly.

Then my ex came out looking for something and I handed it to him.

Recognition and his own memories arrived in his gaze, and I hugged him tightly with it in between us.

It symbolized so many things, both personal and as a couple, long before our course had been brutally diverted.

I guess that moving from this last family home is going to bring up and create some sad goodbye memories.”

“To get into a place with bare minimums will so far be more expense for way less space.

I just don’t have the time to wait for something bigger and better.”

Pain
Neglect
Resentment

Pressure
Fear
Insecurity

Lack
Limitation
Imperfection

“To stay ‘even keeled.'”