“Just communicate, already…
All this high-fa-lootin’, ‘airy-fairy,’ New Ageism hyper philosophyin’ is fun until things really matter.
Then you need to get down to basics to build solid grounding.
I mean, you’ve gotta have nets and nests of security for love to catch you if you fall and to rest together in – if you’re gonna fly to the sky!”
—
(Content of multiple meanings)
He must have no idea how his promise affected me.
I am in constant war with myself to keep balanced.
How could he offer – awakening – and then just leave?
I fight to suppress my feelings daily to keep breathing.
There is a great deal to
Address and overcome
In creating and building
A functional relationship
Song repost from November 2021.
I am stuck on a repeat cycle where
Men are attracted to be my burden
What I mean is they like my strength
So think they can put weight on me
For the health of our relationship
Desiring a free ride’s easy breeze
So I have to keep my heart reigned
Ready to stop and walk away again
Because attraction’s initiation
Doesn’t guarantee partnership
When he met me he saw a nice body
On a mistreated sweet young woman
He wanted to be the hero
But without responsibility
He did not want to meet and
Grow beyond life challenges
Yet connecting, I leveled up quickly
Having desired to constantly evolve
And he realized that
He’d made a mistake
And refused to discuss
Collaboration’s change
Repost from March 2022
“Feeling one’s brain shift around inside.”
(Ouch!)
Desiring a personal holiday
Despite barriers prohibiting
“I figured out where the paper clips were – and that I could use the pointy tip of one to clear out the hole of my incense holder so that I could insert another stick!”
“Concussion retriggered – but bedroom floor is vacuumed!”
Every nerve quivers to restore
Clean order peace to my place
But if I do, I won’t finish school
It’s clear that I’ve become a fool
To think that I can self regulate
These external impulses pulling
Internal focus away from center
Distracting by fritter-frettering
Not because I wish to self harm
But because I need my strength
To help clear out garage’s glut
Get extra furniture stored in it
To clean the messes in my yard
To restore bedroom high regard
To clean the bathroom walls
Where broken fan has failed
And to vacuum front rooms
Then mop/dust away gloom
—
(Title of multiple meanings)
My hound has eaten the wood ends
Of the vintage designed coffee table
Because she has witnessed the others
Chewing on as ruining kitchen chairs
She has lost all reserve hollering
The others wear no bark collars
Anarchy reins supreme by family
Coming and going in own skeins
I have the honor of assisting
When arms want to overturn
Chaos, dirt, and mess by strength’s
Redetermination that I can’t access
Other dogs have access to my space
Where mine were denied for reasons
Other dogs tear apart the careful regard
My own had for our inclusive politeness
They all now bark shattering my sanity
Destroying and tracking as I can’t clean
Nor tread safely without bump-injury
In whirlwinds when attempt to leave
I can not seem to get back into that room
The one where fat is a reality nourishing
Where the brain is no longer quivering
Because knows marrow is replenishing
It’s a state of mind shift where settling
Into moments relaxed and surrounding
Where no emergencies bombard-invade
Where nothing wastes by playing games
Why is it hard to hard-stop insecurities
Driving me to push against the injuries?
There is time here gathering in offering
Allowing me to final-run finish studies
Yet the concussion clamps to prevent
A determination that refuses to relent
Why is it so important that I be stopped
From the simplest-task meagerest want?
Why am I being thoroughly interfered with
Beating me down enforcing toward lament?
Just leave me alone I need not atone
There’s no self reflection to gain here
Having already done the work my soul
Knows what it burns in desire to learn
—
(Title of multiple meanings)
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