I need to get back into
Previous yoga-pilates
But it was not safe to
After the car accident
So it’s hard to believe
Strength will recover
Although time’s passing
Says to do now not later
Category: Altered States
Depths Of Connection
As my body resettling
Moves to new “normal”
It brings to the surface
Support tissue atrophy
When lying upon a shoulder
Things sink where shouldn’t
Causing destabilizing strains
To bone attachment structure
Accident Prone
Going into third year of recovery’s
Recurring negative enforcements
—
(Title of multiple meanimgs)
I Enjoy Learning
But I no longer enjoy deadlines
Or veering tangents in content
Higher Education
Associate’s shows dedication
Pending Bachelor’s ever limbo
Step By Step
“Like I said before, ‘digging out sideways with a spoon’ – and giving thanks for having a spoon!”
—
(Aggrandized minimalism)
Me, Myself, & I
“We are pretty dissatisfied in this current predicament.”
(Sophisticated Cissy – The Meters)
Great Angst
“Trying to coordinate fingers threading shoe laces through resistantly-tight, flick-flapping shoe straps.
What happened to standardly-practical, solid and easy-to-use holes?”
(I Gotta Right To Sing The Blues – Jack Teagarden)
Frustration
“Essential baseline components of my daily functional clothing that are diffucult to replace have just broken down.”
Will I Rise Again?
When my grandparents finally rested,
They either gave up & chose to die or
Stayed in bed for the rest of their lives
(Crazy Girl – Eli Young Band)
Two & A Half Years
Being unable to work
Dependent on systems
Has very much sucked as
I prefer self determination
(Say That You Will – Sleep Token)
Death Struggles
“I keep trying to reanimate how I survived before – but I can’t…those ways don’t apply, anymore.”
Discontinuity
“Being unable to work flies into the face of the American Dream.”
Dust To Dust
I’ve got nothing to strive for
No more umph in my motor
I always had manifestation
As my high-driving priority
Even if I had to wait
I knew it was there
I could feel it’s pressence
Just like I feel you, my love
It’s very discouraging after all of that
To find myself flat-stopped, diverted
No more climbing
No more aspiring
Because I’m just
So damn hurting
Nothing seems attainable anymore
It’s just slipping through my fingers
Wiped Out
“I must try to sleep more before my day begins….
I am deliriously exhausted.”
(The World I Know – Collective Soul)
To The Last Drop
“Any money that I get is usually limited, so I try to spread it around to hit as many needed zones, which results in there being none left – but much gets attended to.”
(Jaws – Sleep Token, Live in South Carolina)
Don’t Jolt Me Like That
“It Hurts.”
(Blue Collar Man/Long Nights – Styx)
Song repost from 2023
Frequency
“Constant strategizing to avoid catastrophe and maintain functionality.”
(You Better Run – Pat Benatar)
(Treat Me Right – Pat Benatar)
Renegotiating
Sanity
I Need To
“Try to sleep more…”
Carrying The Burden
“It becomes more clear that my neck, shoulders, and spine have become more destabilized since the concussion accident as muscles torque-torsion into spasmed misalignments carrying loads that they weren’t meant to be hoisting.”
A Virus Among Us
“I think that the virus my family has had for two weeks is trying to get to me.”
Like A Lion’s Mane
Golden red-silver filagree
Coiling taught as if brittle
In soft to wiring spiraling
Framing as grows thicker
Due to daily washing and
Blow dry scalp prevention
Since summer’s awareness
Floating like a haloed cloud
Why
“Can’t I sleep?”
A Moment Of Normalcy
“Yesterday, thanks to an investing client’s generosity, I had a little bit of funding to go out and obtain a few special items as Christmas gifts for my children and their beloveds.
I took a pause in the evening as bit a large, satisfying mouthful from a too-long-awaited Carl’s Jr Triple Western Cheeseburger (TM) lettuce wrap with double-blended Pink Drink (TM) topped with whipped cream sip soon to follow, and felt and gave thanks for the timely ‘abundance’ blessing.”
(Feel – Two Lanes)
We Must Be Careful
“Regarding what we allow ourselves to be influenced by…
We must be constantly double-checking to make sure that these influences align with our authenticity in this time of virtual realities – before we buy into what they are selling.”
(Sunshine Down Dualoguc, Original)
Positive Reinforcement
“Reassurance that comes from being around other people who’s brain waves track well with mine.”
(Got To Give It Up – Marvin Gaye)
Sex Appeal
“I don’t feel like I’ve got anything going my way in this category, currently.”
Literally! (Fell On Black Days – Soundgarden)
Song repost from March 2022
I Am
Managing.
Puffer Fish
“Dang-nab it!
The concussion has made my body swell, again!”
“Derezzed”
(Pneuma – Tool)
Backed Into A Corner
“I was not responding well as of today from the concussion when getting other people’s help as they were pressuring.
I was either dealing with their trying to be time efficient and going in too many directions at once – spinning me in circles – and/or wasting my time, etc..”
The Question Is
“Can you self regulate?”
—
(Re the maelstrom that descends when engaging resource acquisition processes due to brain injury)
“There Can Be Only One”
“I now have two kinds of brain injury – and boy, let me tell you how fun this is navigating the shattered internal stratosphere!”
—
(Title reference to movie Highlander and the struggle to reclaim primary power)
Brain Injury Gaslighting
“An advocate for brain injury support tried helping me today, and finished our appointment by giving me the number to call my next errand item.
After several times of copy and pasting the number, dialing, and getting my own voicemail, I finally realized that she had given me my own number by accident!”
—
(Re: object identification shutdowns)
Look Here
It is about finding truth in expression
Hopefully with some gentile elegance
—
(Title of multiple meanings)
