Category: Comedy
Object Identification
“Making it to the brief haven of a larger handicap bathroom stall, I stop abruptly, trying to figure out why I cannot see/recognize/identify the toilet paper rolls.
It’s because the dispenser has been removed since the other day!!!”
(Don’t Bring Me Down – Electric Light Orchestra)
A Moment’s Pause
“I must rest amid transitions to allow my pieces to catch up, rest, and reorient.
Translation: I am ever late to any destination.”
Things Gone Awry
“I tried powdered gelatin in watered coffee, yesterday.
Can’t say that I liked it, but I got it down.
So this morning, I thought that adding it to hot tea could melt and assist it in dissipated distribution.
And at first, it seemed tasty,..
But then as I stirred and went to pull my tea bag out of the way, there was this extra, large clumpy lump.
So curious, I chewed on it.
No.
Nonononononononono.
It tasted like a hoof and bits stuck to my lips!”
(You Spin Me Round [Like a Record] – Dead Or Alive)
We’ve Just Met, But
Sudden Craving
“Why do I want a fresh-baked, plain yet crispy-edged, hint-of-buttery warm donut?”
(New Moon On Monday – Duran Duran)
Knee Smack Into The Piano
“‘It’s a new, bruise on Monday…'”
—
(Reference to Duran Duran’s “New Moon On Monday”)
Pure Lunacy
“I do not know why I keep thinking that there’s a chance that I can get my food and get out the door without any animal complications!”
—
(This mornimg’s present, two piles of dog sh**)
Whom Do You Serve!
Mmmmm…Piiiiie
Attachments
“Buttons are coming loose from threads over-wearing.”
So, So…Angry
Things To Do Before Marriage
Dress To Impress
I Do Not Like
Sour towels.
(Master & Servant – Depeche Mode)
Honest Interest
Adapting
Emotional Regulation Skills
Chuckle
“A bright yellow meat bee swiggled in through my open back behind the driver seat car door – and then I had to let him out on the passenger side front door, where he was waiting patiently pondering at the mystery of the window.”
Great Confidence Boosters
“Your timer’s tickin’ – be sure to freak out!”
Feck!
—
(Pneumococcal pneumonia ad, ” If you’re over fifty…!)
“Reaching Inward”
hCaptcha
“OMG – NOOOO!
Exactly that which activates my brain injury!”
—
(Trying to access lyrics – and bailing!)
Map Of California For Beginners
When Music Makes A Difference
I Just Want The Basics
Opinions On The State Of The Economy
You Look Happier
Emergin’ As The Villain
Awkward Moments
He hugged her, complimenting her on the smell of her jacket’s perfume.
“It’s not mine,” she laughingly confided. “I hugged a dear friend of mine earlier – that’s her favorite smell.”
—
(In dreams)
YAAS
What Happens Next
Remains
To be
Seen
—
(Content of multiple meanings)
How Long To Callibrate My Moon River?
Get A Horse!
Comedic Outlet
She fantasized about him carrying her to bed – both romantically, and of necessity.
—
(Hip twisting extreme sudden pain, again.)
“They Have No Idea!”
(Sleepwalking – Elderbrook)
“Welcome In”
(Level Up – Ciara)
Ok, Starbucks Won
“The one ad that I could not skip past:
‘You know you want this yummy.
Level up.
Level up – Level up -Level up!’
In my mind, I am so THERE!”
—
(Jonesing because I haven’t had the money for my ‘medication.’)
(This Is The Picture [Excellent Birds] – Peter Gabriel)
Yeah…
“It is kind of brutally funny, this living amid personal tragedy.”
Suspended Animation
Although she seemed to have little control over the direction that her ship was hurtling, she could play with the gravity adjustments and attempt to reduce her discomfort.”
More Dreams
“And the last still ended up with my shirt spontaneously off.”
(What the -?!)
EEE-YA-AH!
“Aparrently, lifting weight makes my hip joints lose their sh**!”
(“The PAIN!!!” – original Dune quote)
Candid Corvid Productions 