First offense: “How-dare-you!”
Second offense: “Sa-cri-ledge!”
—
(Husky-voiced, demonic wrath)
Category: Comedy
Abstract Humor
“A sign read, ‘Mental Health And Jesus.’
I couldn’t help internally busting-out laughing at the myriad of implicated applications.”
The Last Hurrah!
As she at last loaded the final bag full of garbage and got it held down by old shelving into the ttailer, she stepped fully – both feet with a glorious, oockie-murked splashing – into the midnight-hidden thick puddle of storm water.
Trying To Get Up
“Aaaaaaaaauuugggghhh….
Char-ley Hor-sessssss!!!”
(It’s A Beautiful Morning – The Rascals)
Where’s My
“COF-FEEE??!!!”
“I’ve Been Tagged”
Transcendant Food
“Something To Look Forward To”
They’re All Lookin’ At Me
“Are you sure you’re gonna do that?”
“YES!
I’m gonna do a u-turn with a mattress on a trail-er!”
—
(Actually, it’s a box spring…)
“‘Cause That’s…NoteWorthy”
Listen to ‘Cause That’s…NoteWorthy – April 15, 2026.m4a by Candid Corvid Productions on #SoundCloud
https://on.soundcloud.com/fL6jac8CiS1Dq1XmO0
Challenge Level
Glass shattered desk drop off and stormy, wind blowing gusts in rainy weather.
“Come onnnnn…
It’s my last day to move my stuff out on my own, tod-aaayyyy!”
“Good Will”
“It has just been announced that I am officially a ‘senior’ – and as recompense reward, I qualify for 10% off today!
Eh, Sonny?
Bring me my caaaaaannnee!”
Now Get Off!
Dress For Success!
Clarity
“‘Cause foggy glasses are good…”
Moving Out Be Like
Now THAT
“Was SATISFYING!”
Day After (Spin Scroll With Unfocused Eyes)
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Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after Day after
Married Life Be Like
Pause – And Then, Deep Breath
“GUUUUUUUUUUPPPPPPPP!”
(Deep frowny-down gasping bass fish mouth)
A Shrew, To You!
15%
Phone juice remaining.
That’s A-Morrr-Ay!
You Just Can’t!
“How can you compete with Jane Seymour?”
“Ok…I’ll Go, I’ll Go, I’ll Go”
(Nodisco – Depeche Mode)
Holiday Cheer
Better Whatch It!
Worship
You Are Right
Commander?
(Get Ready For This – 2 Unlimited)
Do You Know Barbara?
Multi-Task
Looking Behind Me
“I saw another vehicle’s lights indicating that is was getting ready to back up.
It turns out that it was my car in the dark of a full length window.
This has to be a metaphor for something…”
But I Found
“A partially eaten, readily-available Payday(TM) candy bar, instead.”
“No Gum” (Song)
By Athena Stairs, Aoril 1, 2026
That’s not gum
Where’s my gum?
Give me the gum
Can’t find the gum
Looking for gum
Can’t find my gum
I need
My
Gum
—
(Contact me for permissions)
—
Listen to No Gum – 4.1.26.m4a by Candid Corvid Productions on #SoundCloud
https://on.soundcloud.com/w3g9frfYtU80GmKPCz
(We’ve Only Just Begun – Carpenters)
Maslow’s Stress Check Test
“I find it darkly hilarious that they are still using these things – when clearly, we all have enough trauma by now to bomb it.”
Black Death
“Boo-Ta Boo Boo…” (Lost Disco Thrills – Eyeto8 ft. Frouin Tom)
Prospective Relief
“To no longer carry all of the household bills for a 3-bedroom family house on my own.
My own creaking timbers need load relief!”
Overload The System
When Rain Pours
Never Forget
California Street Cred
Breakfast Of Champs
“Gluten’free too salt-buttery Ritz(TM)-type crackers and past expiration date rice pudding…
Still tastes viable.”
Candid Corvid Productions 