Category: Stream of Thought

“Home Is Where The Heart Is.”

“I AM A UNICORN – HEAR ME ROAR!”

Everything you are into – I want this with you.

I dreamed she did not truly love him, and I thought that the dream was lying.

Why keep showing me things to keep me desiring him – when clearly he was taken?

A man and two children across the way from our back field are playing with swords made of branches, taking on each other to test their might with respect, courtesy – and fierce war cries.

I created a new song today, capturing a thematic and lyrics.

Then, a new friend asked to hear me sing it – and soon after, I could!

Angel number 929 is often said to mean trust and freedom. But it is so, so much more than that. It’s the purging of anything and everything that’s unaligned with your truest and highest self. It’s the finding of your true source of happiness and awakening of primal kundalini energy within your body.

https://typicallytopical.com/

This is the third time I am missing work and important job opportunities because others are not following consistent preventative protocol.

I was trying to have us join a gym and martial arts, but with close quarters and lack of diligence, I am just not going to get involved!

There is a big push to run out and get tested if you think you have COVID.

But, I am so shakey, it is best that I stay home in bed first and get self regulated.

One begins to doubt their own capabilities when encountering so much disruption.

Why have I yet not painted my toenails?

Because that takes time.

Then it takes time to dry completely.

And fuss to protect it until it is, so it isn’t ruined.

I am too busy adapting minute by minute to circumstances.

Unfortunately, this “fun” gets relegated to frivolity.

Which is something right now that I just cannot “afford.”

“est appris utilisé”

Not as easy to say as it looks!

Having come from experiencing broken morality, it is necessary even in polyamory that “wife” is prized above all others. She must be the queen everyone defers to.

In all if my relationships, I was never “first.”

There was either distance, denial, infidelity – or love placed in a hearse.

It’s as much – if not more so – our laughter together while she literally holds space for me and we flirt with the tease.

We understand each other somehow, and this is a great relief after being on my own for so long in unrelenting hardship.

European, Sicilian, Hungarian (or was it Austrian?), Syrian, Arabic, Russian, and Starseed.

Ancestral heritage beckons to explore!

Forced…Climbing Out…Ascension

I’m a complex creature.

Underground

Limbo

Surface

I don’t know how I can, although I know I would.

Tuesday morning on my way to work, a smallish but adult bald eagle soared across from my left to right front.

The bright white of its head and tail were so pure in sunlight that their reflection near-blinded as it tilt-canted in flight.

I thought “what perfect balance” where body of earth glides as head and tail guide through air.

A symbolism of the mind and intuition being “grounded.”

My eldest and I are bridging together, again!

So Happy Me!!!!

Shakti Gawain, Louis Hayes, and Polarity healing energy greet me as if I am still training in the 90’s.

When I feel under the weather and cannot move nor think quickly, I begin to doubt my performance capabilities when it comes to work – and/or anything.

The only way around it is to get up and move forward, anyway.

Pushing when sluggish to get to the gym, acupuncture, and a massage.

It’s time we have an upgrade where deeper truths are brought to illumination – rather than just “face value” arbitration.

I received a message three units could be paid for this semester

I ought to be excited, but there is so much still to untangle for the semester to start.

Over ten years to get to this point ends up with me just being tired.

There is hope for additional employment.

Insecurities like to prey when we are exhausted.

I know that it was mostly me that held it all together.

It is just strange that it has always been this way.

I think there is supposed to be balance between two people in a relationship.

But, maybe these concepts make more sense to me – and to others are still relatively new.

Remind me of its virtues when what I build keeps crumbling down.

My pear tree was still there, and we also brought it home, yesterday!

If a man is not my “usual type,” but I like things about him, is this good or bad to pursue relationship?

A few core, simple yet classy additions to our lives have brightened our day.

Youngling and I laughed so hard as we teased each other and squabbled over who would get which crystaline stone treasures.

We found and purchased a gorgeous Paradise male betta with flowing burnt orange fins and blue opal body that we’ve named Diaphanous.

We had a lovely dinner in our favorite bakery restaurant and vied for sips of the latest hot chocolate with morsels of favorite deserts.

Then, we finished the evening by obtaining a few key needed items that also accent and enrichen our home’s ambiance.

PUA sent me back to UI.

Like a game of dear old “Pong” – “g-nip, g-nop!” with me as the ball!

Despite my own needs and desires, I can see people’s vulnerabilities and refuse to be selfish.

This means I naturally build rapport and inherently help to enhance others’ quality of living.

In doing so, I do not transgress across boundaries – even if individuals would do so or let me, willingly.

Instead, in my daily interactions, I deep listen among the multitudes to find traces of the man who can belong with me.

I get fragments of impressions that taunt and elude my arms’ reaching.

He doesn’t seem to be anywhere near me.

I found a bare root dwarf type outside in the lineups of other fruit varieties, but the store was closed, so I could not purchase it.

For several days, I keep returning to get it – but, the store’s hours change over the weekend to where I get deflected.

When I find a spark between me and another person and extend them my friendship, I automatically discover where they need healing – and find that I can provide a piece of the puzzle that they have been missing and/or seeking.

But, when I try to arrange for my own needs, I end up supporting them more than they can actually help me.

It can feel like a bit of a let down on my own quest for healing to not get much receiving.

But, as a healer, at least I get to do what I am here for.

I am beginning to feel that I have Choice, again.

More so perhaps than I ever have before – and between more good than bad.

*Sigh*

“It’s been a long time coming…”

I begin teaching again, doing a little work, and making a new friend.

But, I know what love is for – and how to take it higher.

I will share love, joy, and deep bonding where the sparks happen, and people are willing.

We are all meant for more happiness than we have been allowed.

With healthy boundaries and heartfelt embracing – it’s time to start Living!

Taking turns leading and supporting in a thriving, intimate relationship – what would this be like?

I’ve gotten so close before, but have never been fully invited through the door.

I had desired to have more children of my own.

But, I also know that doing so is complicated.

There is a lot of good work needed in the world.

My partner and I must share a mutual dynamic.

I have one client tomorrow, out of a potential of six.

“Lo though I suffer the little deaths, I shall rise again…”

I got both pups out today, individually.

So proud me walking with each and connecting in harmony.

When I am about to slip, something steps in to divert me.

Which is good because I am tired of being so darn diligent!

I am witty in my own, weirdly fun way…

The one on the right is flying on its back with wings outstretched behind it, neck curled up and looking at the other flying at it from the left with feet extended forward as they are cavorting.

I wrestle with with what to say, here.

Respect for others’ privacy ranks as high priority.

And yet, the parts that define who I am must be seen.

After having trouble uploading my documents into the rental assistance application website login where administration requested 4 times that I resend the same things, we had one final step to complete for our application to at last be processed.

But, when I went back in to finish this bit, now the system will not let me proceed because it has changed over into wanting 2021 tax info, instead of 2020’s already prepared.

Employers have until the end of January to issue this data – and mine are waiting until then, if they even follow through with doing so, depending on whether they in their own convenience considered me an “employee” or an “independent contractor” with given variances.

This amounts to our being stuck in administrative processing, getting nowhere again.