Category: Stream of Thought

I have an interview today, and two tomorrow.

Come, ride along with me as I open my sails to catch Winds of Prosperity, seeking “safe haven” islands.

i worked last night for eight hours, and earned what I could have for less than an hour and a half in a client session.

But, I needed the reset – the reset to where youngling and I first began here – because what happened with the chiropractors has so derailed me.

We were insecure before this – and we were happy and positive.

It was the lure of opening up to and settling into the illusion of “belonging” – then having people I trusted turn viciously against me – that destroyed my sense of safety.

And yet, I was the fool who Believed…

The meaning and symbolism of number 1223 speak volumes about love. It’s a symbol of not only romance but deep personal emotions. The people who constantly see number 1223 are emotional and romantic. They hunger for affection and are always looking for opportunities to express their love and emotions.

numerology.nation.com

I had a pen.

I clearly put it in my pocket.

Now it eludes me.

I’ve been trying for two days now to deposit this small check into a different account

Clearly, for some reason, this is currently not “meant to be.”

Perhaps my love of flying has to do with perspective.

When I’m above the world, nothing seems as drastic, and I realize how good life could be.

If we let it.

515 means letting go of the old and letting in with the new; also means, to move forward in situations and allow yourself to blend in with the positive. Do not let bad situations define your life.

sacredscribesangelnumbers.blogspot.com

Angel number 455 stands for growth and progress. The divine realm has sent its finest forces to assist you in life’s journey. The angels and the Ascended Masters are keen that you work for your soul mission and Divine life purpose. This is more so because they want you to know the meaning of true peace and happiness.

thesecretofthetarot.com

Gotta love the messaging!

A man can only be this if he abdicates his authority – instead of working toward productive, beneficial collaborations.

Angel number 300 is a cue from the divine forces that you have to respect the people who were behind your success and be grateful. In other words, having good people will make your life better and great. Therefore, your guardian angels emphasize surrounding yourself with great people who can change your life.

“Trust your inner gut” @ SunSigns.org

I am not susceptible – but pursuadable.

Angel number 255 symbolizes changes, transformations and opportunities. This number tells us to be more productive and more open to new ideas. This is the only way we can progress in life and make significant changes. If we continue to go down he same road, then nothing is going to change.

angelnumbersmeaning.com

With the smooth layout now of this apartment, how easy it would be to just go into the kitchen and make my Finish pancake!

(Tummy grumblings for the rich custardy…)

I write here because people do not listen to me.

It is said that things happen for a reason.

So, in losing this job which felt like a good fit, maybe I avoided some disaster.

Maybe the woman there was jealous, for example, and when things would come to surface later, she’d be chosen over me at greater losses to me.

So, this disolving now prevented larger losses.

It just doesn’t make sense how things upended suddenly, without their being some hidden factor.

It isn’t for the perpetrator, it’s to set the victim free.

And how I would define it is different from most traditions.

I cannot forgive someone from doing harm (unless I have reason to do so, personally), but I can learn to dissolve my attachment – and let “God” be Judge and Jury.

There’s a game going around where people try to destroy others’ reputations.

Why? Not for truth or justice – or basis in facts.

But, because they want to feel right in doing bad things.

And they do not care what harm comes of it.

I will not stoop to their level.

Even if it means again that I cannot gain employment.

I was never part of the system, really.

Observing current rabidity, why would I want to be?

“Love thine neighbor” – unless they are not already part of your community.

Then stone them, or nail them to a cross.

It isn’t me. I don’t cause problems.

They always have pre-established clicks.

Thetefore, I’m seen as expendable.

“Eat, my sweet hounds – dear followers into unknown destiny!”

My brain and body have been boxed in for the last three years.

It’s been like being on lockdown, before, during, and after initial pandemic.

This mitigated my ingenuity and constrained my ability to create dynamic interrelationships.

I need to get over this hump of the local office resigning on me, and its effects on my psychology.

I am behaving shell-shocked, likely from what I’ve also just escaped from.

There are many other offices here, maybe an even better fit for me.

Or maybe, I’ll just go mobile-solo again.

I’m surprised to feel as if I’m thawing from ice.

I just need to get my muscles warmed up again.

When people turn against you and let you down.

People often attack what they do not – or refuse to – understand.

I’m beginning to have suspician that chiropractors do not want patients healed by massage therapy – and when they realize how good I am, they feel their position is threatened.

When I began my quest to leave there, I lept beyond my understanding.

Now that I’ve arrived, new learning’s just beginning.

There are different parameters of expectation placed upon you, depending on if you’re an independent contractor or employee.

But, if you are held to double standards, there’s no way to properly manuever to succeed.

1155 meaning is telling you that what you are now is not what you will always be. There is room for change and becoming better. Trust in yourself and your abilities and believe that everything in your life will work out. Trust in your guardian angels to guide and support you anytime you need them.

https://www.sunsigns.org/angel-number-1155-meaning/#:~:text=1155%20meaning%20is%20telling%20you,you%20anytime%20you%20need%20them.

I must no longer find blame in myself for others’ wrong doings.

Trying to keep ahead of the wave that threatens to crush me leaves little room for school or other self expansion.

The rich disparage the poor for not becoming educated, while dumping their garbage down the way for us to deal with.

Put them in a boat on Shit Stream without an oar – and see how well they’ll paddle!

When a person is in distress, their insides hang out.

One cannot review the good memories without a taint to their sweetness.

With constant, unexpected shifting of any minorly-gleaned elusive security capsizing and then burning, at some point the yammering, adrenaline-laden mind finally says:

“Fuck it!”

And opts out.

As I acknowledge both the good and bad as I write about my life, maybe I regain what others discarded.

It’s the loud, obnoxious kids that always got attention, gaining reward without merit like baby birds competing in a nest for survival.

But, all those baby birds that were more quiet and since diminished for lack of nourishment could have been keys to their species’ survival.

Just like introverts take the time to understand reasons and find solutions to ways that are no longer viable.

For now, I put off eating when hungry.

Extroverts seem to love always being on the surface of their consciousness, ready with a quick word of response and knowing exactly how they’d take quick command of a situation.

I am not sure if it’s from all of the head trauma or past suppressive abuse, but in my mind, there’s a layer of disconnect.

In healing sessions, my receive-and-response time is instant because I am more fully in the moment while my consciousness is firmly tethered to my senses.

But, in the external world, overt reaction takes a back seat, as the rest of me absorbs data of others’ intentions for later analysis and response reflection.

I have not received any response from the office regarding my request for fair play’s reconsidering.

Pedantic misrepresentation and lack of moral ethics seems widerspread than effects of the pandemic.

People have a hard time reconciling that a deep thinker is not necessarily judging and can also have playful and neutral aspects to them.

Prebias tends to want to.categorize and justify white-washed conclusions – possibly because many people have not diversified much in their own personality aspects.

And, when you are capable of being and expressing more dynamicly than those you frequently encounter, the world can seem devoid of reciprocative cheer – and full of idiocy.

Tell me what having one is like – be it between one’s self and the world; between the feeling of security vs. another’s enmity; or even any give-and-take flex in interactive relationships.

Is it something you’ve ever experienced, or is the real truth only that having one is a myth – like getting to ride a unicorn?

How does one remove from their self the guilt from others’ sins and the shame of their condemnation?

When congestion begins to thicken into white blood cell-laden mucosa, it layers passageways of one’s sinuses in head and neck along lymphatic channels, putting pressure on tympanic membrane and other balance orientation regulators.

What I dislike most about this process is the feeling of being “socked in” – as if pulled into myself, smothered, and seeing everything from too far away of a distance.

I ordered the same griiled sandwhich: gluten-free bread, cucumber, lettuce, carrots, pea sprouts, stoneground mustard, mayo, roast beef, and provolone cheese.

How can something that initially is large and fluffy just melt and disintegrate into your mouth – as if it was nothing?

This must truly be “Food of the Gods.”

Post nasal drip: Ack – it’s got me!

Filling up my lungs, making it hard to breathe and causing coughing.

I think deeply about things, and when I deeply think, I then think deeper.

It’s like being on an escalator that rises, then descends and goes side to side – analyzing from various angles to determine where something ends and begins in its breadth and spectrums.

If someone arbitrarily kicks you to the curb to save their own skin without questing for a better alternative, are they really someone you’d want to partner with in business or personal relationship?

As a hopeful optimist, I often initially give people “the benefit of doubt” – and am beginning to wonder if maybe I shouldn’t.

“Aim for the sky, because even if you miss, you’ll still be among the stars.”

How do you miss the sky and still be among the stars?

Choose carefully between the seen and the unseen, for intuition may guide you only so far as the truth is not actively hidden.

I’ve had it proven my therapies are beneficial and needed, yet in what forum may I be received and welcome?

My life must become more than managing others’ “fuckery” and its negative affects on me and my family!

I felt that if I said anything, this could cause overreaction.

It wasn’t that I was at all wrong – but that people are easily threatened.