Category: Stream of Thought

How do you unsee something that penetrate’s mind’s acuity?

Completion of tasks leads me onward when rays’ hope cannot permeate disillusion and insecurity.

I attempted a better position, but encountered the same scenario.

“Did you really want that role with me?” He lifted an eyebrow inquisitively.

She thought for a moment of implications and possibilities…

“I guess I didn’t,” she admitted, reluctantly.

“My game runs deeper.”

It was strange to find that the hinging point where I’d been stuck was that I’d never had the chance to say what I’d thought of his treatment of me.

Once I was given this chance inadvertently, that unsettled part inside me I’d carried forward through over quarter of a century was released!

Mirrors are strange apparitions designed to reflect ego’s weakness.

I have just been positively reinforced of my dependability, industriousness, sincerity, meticulousness, and zeal.

Even numbers are smooth and rounded, bringing flow’s harmonics, whereas odd numbers are angled and positioned into pushing us to next levels.

I needed my position better secured in order to risk further.

I dreamed that he had set aside a portfolio for me in anticipation of the day I could claim it and join his efforts.

What an honor that I’d relish!

Once my heart has opened to someone, it stays opened.

Only time and distance fades connection – which is now near impossible if someone is well-known on social media.

Trying to mute yearning gets negated as soon as images randomly repopulate one’s screen.

If they pull away, it is best to not further pursue.

This is mainly true regarding men – not children.

Children need guidance – but men must “know better.”

If you give guidance to a man, you play the role of teacher or surrogate mother.

The ideal that I could mean so much to someone I esteem: having my affections returned is an ultimate dream.

The evening tapped out before beginning – which I would think odd, for a Friday.

I wanted to just go back to my room and call it a night, but instead, I foolishly went searching for cleaning supplies to prepare the new home for our arrival.

As I walked to the entrance of the store, I had my wallet out to replace my license, after walking the dogs with it in my pocket.

I heard a man whisper, Hey miss! Hey miss!” But it didn’t permeate until I’d passed him.

He was be-scraggled and had a young child in a shopping cart with him, hidden from view of the market staff, so they wouldn’t catch him.

I must have looked like an easy mark – and it made me mad that he was using a child to justify his intent.

The statues are placed like wards, guarding.

When you look directly at them, it seems preposterous that the mind conjured elements more complex from periphery.

In passing, there’s impression of an odd strangeness – as if, in fact, they were not fashioned by human hands.

Masses of people all over the globe lost faith in God because God did not stop The Great Wars.

But, if we review scriptures, God has only intervened if it was “His” war to begin with – by “His” design.

Man’s “free will” has been left up to us to moderate, until such times.

I love that I called his bluffs…I didn’t know “I had it in me!”

How can a process so important to cosmic variances be termed so silly?!

We know each other, intimately.

It keeps pulling and won’t let go of my being – despite my flurried swats to”Just get off of me!”

It holds me hostage by my own attachments that I’m still discovering.

Seamless transition between waking and deeper channeling states.

I won’t venture farther like the others and become a tool.

I’ve worked too hard to regain the sense of self that I have.

I reject that which harms me, seeking to redesign my reality.

I’ve got to be “relieved”…this is the only option that can bring best gains, ultimately.

Who knew emotions were something to be worked on?

Luckily, I’ve come to understand they are like wild horses – full of passionate self expression.

They can be trained and tamed to some degree, like spirit-unbroken steeds.

Those who work with stallions (vs. geldings) know what I mean.

And once you gain their trust, they share secrets about the world you’d normally not see.

Is it really such a good idea?

I know we have the media technology.

And the world is primed for absorptive following.

But, all emperors think they know best.

It’s called a complex.

I don’t like being told what to think, nor how to think about it – so for the most part, I ignore them.

Spectrumed rays of an embered sun burst from her chest as her heart opened.

She kept trying to cover the area to stop the outpouring; attempted to seize the rays as they streamed, unending…

This evening, I happened upon a dance event, where the music was to my liking.

Being initially shy, and still having the dogs to walk and dinner to get for my youngest, by the time I returned, there was only a half hour left.

I got one song in at my pace, with my eyes closed, channeling the energy. But then the music slowed, and I stretched and huddled against the wall to stay warm, observing.

I’m not sure they will play my type of music at the next gathering, but I got out there and expressed myself – exuberantly!

As a species, we’ve been hit hard by the pandemic causing loneliness and too much experienced loss.

Like birds, we’re migrating to better grounds where we can avoid further isolation and population mitigation.

A flock’s survival instinct is “safety in numbers.”

I like them.
They are mine – and –
I will put them where I want to!

A dangerous concept –
When it’s been lacking.

“Why are you doing this? Come back!” the woman pleaded, desperation weighing in her tone.

He refused to turn and face her as he marched down the hall, grabbed his keys, and exited the house – his partially secured bow tie flapping.

Analysis of avenues and attachments:
Slower response – but, better payoff.

They say that what we focus upon helps guide our tendencies – that it’s a matter of self discipline and meditation.

What they don’t acknowledge is when your instinct and heart gang up on you, you become conscripted by your soul’s interventions!

“If you choose that one, your career is finished. Maybe you can float a few more projects, but ultimately, people will forget about you.

If you go this way we’ve chosen for you, you get the golden feed bag and the chance to stud when you want to.”

This sense of decompression, despite pressures squeezing.

I had not realized that our living circumstances and location could have been having such an impact on our mental-emotional health being negated.

I guess that’s what can happen, when you’re an optimist!

It’s a fine trick of the mind to master patterns.

Then, to notice how they interact with you, and you with them.

Then, to observe yourself from a distance.

A piece of Finish Pancake custard tumbled off my fork, fragmenting into three pieces to divert my attention as one bypassed my guard and flew to the ground next to our hound’s crate.

I thought to myself, “Perhaps this is an opportunity to share the delicacy with her…” while noting how absorbed she was in playing with and conquer-chewing the larger, edible plastic bone normally reserved for our wolf.

Then I realized this could tempt her to want more, anytime she would smell my cooking it and see me eating it.

I paused, with prudence, to further examine the idea as I cleaned it up without her noticing.

Whereupon I realized that maybe, I am in this same position.

I’m this, where my heart is directed.

People do it to gain attention.

They hype up their position, gaining followers.

They live for the moments of “hits,” “likes” – and even conflict.

I’m writing to force myself to emerge, to let myself be seen as I’m quivering.

I don’t trust people to manage themselves well.

Maybe because I’m coming out of hell.

What I’ve seen has been obscene.

I love creating titles that hint at and point in different directions, with possible multiple meanings.

If I belonged to you, you would not listen to me nor take me seriously.

Show me how your way is different from my experience.

Make me Believe.

Why was I sent to him, only to make a fool of myself by sharing so much – uncensored?

Is here where I chide myself, and swear off men?

That which I crave isn’t good for me.

(Title from “Blade Runner” movie quote.)

“The philosophy of one century is the common sense of the next.”

I trusted – and was painted as a monster.

Humans can be dangerous and destructive as we learn to master the complex impulse overwhelm of our growing insights and emotions.

The goal is to keep moving forward while improving our abilities and commitment to embetterment, so we outgrow any deformities.

In fighting a battle I could never win –
Sent to Hell, tormented by Chagrin.

Start. Stop.

Push – Go, pause, fumble – stagger.

Stop. Wait…Wait some more…

Analyze, categorize, prepare as strategize.

Worry, fret, breathe – take a breath!

Check again.

Nothing…

Time is stopped as scraping money for functionality.

Bank deposit processes are frozen over the holiday.

I don’t date…

I saw a youngling in the pet store –
And for the first time, I wanted one.

No…I wanted that one.

What am I that I migrate?

It takes mere hours to take apart what took years of trial and error to build as fortification for our chickens’ safe sheltering.

We are finding good homes – people who will delight in taking care of them.

It’s a sad acceptance to close chapters, grateful we got to raise them.